What is a Gimme in Golf: A Duffer’s Guide to Free Putts

Hey there, fellow golf enthusiasts and confused onlookers! Linda Parker here, your friendly neighborhood golf addict from sunny San Diego. If you’re wondering why a middle-aged woman with a swing that looks like a drunk octopus trying to fight its way out of a hammock is writing about golf, well… grab a Arnold Palmer and settle in. We’re about to dive into the wonderful world of golf gimmes.

The Basics: What the Heck is a Gimme?

Picture this: you’re on the 18th green at Torrey Pines (okay, in my dreams), and you’ve got a putt so short that even I couldn’t miss it. Your buddy looks at you and says, “That’s good.” Congratulations, my friend—you’ve just been granted a gimme.

The Unofficial Definition

A gimme is golf’s way of saying, “We trust you not to screw up this ridiculously easy putt, so let’s just pretend you made it and move on with our lives.” It’s like when my husband says he’ll do the dishes later – we all know it’s a lie, but we go along with it to keep the peace.

When Does a Putt Become a Gimme?

Now, here’s where things get about as clear as the water hazard on Coronado’s 14th hole. The unofficial rule of thumb is:

• Distance: Anything within the length of a putter
• Difficulty: Straight and flat (unlike my drives)
• Stakes: Not in tournament play, you tryhard

But let’s be real, the true determinant of a gimme is often:

1. How much your playing partners like you
2. How many Michelobs deep you all are
3. How badly everyone wants to get to the 19th hole for some fish tacos

The Great Gimme Debate

To Gimme or Not to Gimme?

I once played a round at Aviara where my friend refused to take any gimmes. By the 13th hole, we were moving slower than my husband browsing the TV guide. Meanwhile, the group behind us was giving death stares that could melt a Titleist.

On the flip side, I’ve played with folks who expect a gimme for anything within a flagstick’s length. Yeah, right, honey. I’ve seen you miss putts shorter than your… well, let’s just say I’ve seen you miss short putts.

The Gimme Etiquette

Here’s my unsolicited advice on gimme etiquette:

1. Don’t ask for a gimme: It’s like asking if your pants make your butt look big. If you have to ask, you probably don’t want the answer.
2. Be consistent: Don’t be that jerk who only gives gimmes when they’re winning.
3. Use common sense: If your putt is longer than the walk back to the cart, it’s not a gimme.

My Most Embarrassing Gimme Moment

Picture this: I’m playing at Balboa Park, feeling like Annika Sörenstam (pre-retirement, of course). I’ve got a 2-footer for par, and my buddy says, “That’s good.

Now, any sane person would just pick up the ball and move on. But no, I decided to show off and putt it anyway. You can guess what happened next.

That little sucker of a ball decided to take a hard right turn at the last second, missing the hole by a good six inches. My buddy looked at me like I’d just admitted to using foot wedges on every hole.

Moral of the story? When someone offers you a gimme, take the damn gimme.

The Gimme’s Cousin: The Mulligan

While we’re on the topic of golf’s unwritten rules, let’s talk about the mulligan. It’s like a gimme’s rowdier, less respectable cousin. You know, the one who shows up to family gatherings already three sheets to the wind.

A mulligan is essentially a do-over, usually off the first tee. It’s golf’s way of saying, “Okay, we all saw that embarrassing slice into the parking lot. Let’s pretend it never happened and start over.”

My Mulligan Philosophy

Here’s my hot take on mulligans:

1. First tee only: Unless you’re playing with your therapist, limit mulligans to the first tee.
2. One and done: It’s a mulligan, not a box set of your favorite chardonnay. You don’t get to binge.
3. Use it or lose it: If you pipe your first drive down the middle, you don’t get to bank that mulligan for later. This isn’t rollover data on your phone plan.

The Economics of Gimmes

Let’s get serious for a second (I know, I’m as shocked as you are). Gimmes can actually save you money. How, you ask? Well, let me break it down for you:

1. Fewer lost balls: Less time spent putting means less time for your ball to mysteriously disappear into the Bermuda Triangle that is the green.
2. Lower green fees: Faster play could mean squeezing in an extra 9 holes. More golf for your buck!
3. Reduced therapy bills: Less time spent cursing at 3-foot misses means less time needed on your therapist’s couch.

In Conclusion: To Gimme or Not to Gimme?

At the end of the day, gimmes are like that $500 TaylorMade driver I convinced myself would fix my slice – they’re not officially sanctioned, but they make the game a hell of a lot more enjoyable.

So the next time you’re standing over a putt shorter than your patience after a three-putt, and your buddy says “that’s good,” just pick up the ball, tip your visor, and say “thank you.” Then buy them a Stone IPA at the clubhouse. Because in golf, as in life, a little kindness goes a long way.

And remember, whether you’re playing Torrey Pines or your local goat track, the best gimme in golf is the one you earn by sticking it close. So practice those wedges, work on your short game, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll earn a few more gimmes along the way.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a date with the driving range. Those slice-fixing promises on the back of Golf Digest aren’t going to prove themselves wrong!

Catch you on the links,
Linda 🏌️‍♀️